Well, only a year late on this post, but with the Seventh Annual Bar Games Olympiad approaching, I figured it was time.
The Sixth Annual Bar Games Olympics was off to a poor start when day-of bailers once again reared their heads. However, we are professionals – and lucky. Jabe came through once again bringing along his dad, Ed, and Ed’s buddy, Ron. These gents may have been Olympiad newbs, but they were crafty veterans, and first rate trash-talkers. Everyone was instantly intimidated.
And the day can begin
The random draw paired them off together, as well, so they had the chemistry of years of friendship on their side as well. Jabe, meanwhile, got paired off with Tommy. I did not have Bee around to help defend our Two-Time Champions title, and I was nervous until I was put together with Rade. Rado and I were college roommates, teammates, and have even been each other’s date to a wedding, so we also had the advantage of tacit chemistry.
The Ceremonial Eating of the Cheesesteak was as beautiful an opening as any year. In fact, it seems the organizers get better and better at it each year. All it really needs now is a laser light show.
As we trekked over to Bowlmor for the first event, the gentleman outside the establishment told us that their obscenely overpriced pitchers of Bud Light would not be made available to us due to an event that was happening. Mind you, it was around 1pm on a Friday, but I imagine it was an office party. Or maybe a cocaine deal. Maybe both.
Rado dons his glass slippers
We headed over to 300 at Chelsea Piers and commenced. Ed and Ron seemed to be the favorites as Ed mentioned something about a bowling league. Not to mention, his stature matches his son’s, and we all imagined they’d be bowling overhand. Ed had a strong game, though his partner did not match him, unfortunately. Tommy and Jabe rode Jabe’s high score and Tommy’s steady pace to best an even Rade and Charlie.
Scores (followed by event points, then total points):
Jabe & Tom: 144 + 110 = 254 (3,3)
Rade & Charlie: 113 + 110 = 223 (2,2)
Ed & Ron: 139 + 70 = 209 (1,1)
Our small squad headed back east for shufflepuck and pool at the welcoming Plug Uglies. Without Mike this year, shufflepuck was nobody’s strength, though Tommy is known for a finesse game, and Rade had a confident look in his eye.
Cornstarch Lane has claimed many a victim
Rade and I faced off against Ed and Ron first in a game that took its time. Following that game, Ed and Ron stayed on to face Jabe and Tommy. Jabe, no stranger to pucks thanks to his days as an Eph defenseman, bested his old man and faced an increasingly sure-handed Rade. Thanks to some huge numbers from Rade, and two kill-strokes from yours truly, Rade and I claimed the day on the cornstarch.
Ed gets serious.
Jabe & Tom: (2,5)
Rade & Charlie (3,5)
Ed & Ron (1,2)
The billiards table was the next up, and the felt is one of my favorite arenas. It turned out that Ed and Ron were no newcomers to the cue either. However, in both their matches, they went for some aggressive shots, scratching and losing twice. The rest was up to Rade and me, and we came through on top.
Tommy considers his next shot
Jabe & Tom: (2,7)
Rade & Charlie (3,8)
Ed & Ron (1,3)
A disheartened Ed and Ron led the way up to Heidelberg, dreading the Boot after what was, apparently, a bigger night than any of their younger compatriots had attempted. We were served in fine fashion once again, our bartender grinning as she filled the mighty vessels with Radeberger.
The Boot rears its frothy head
The only true drinking event of the day, the Boot Race provides more than just bragging rights to the winners, but can be a serious swing event, providing momentum (and liquid courage) to the victors. As we begin, it is clear that Rade and I, despite our long and storied history of drinking lager for sport, were outmatched. Ed and Ron had their Boot on the table in 1:26, while we were a mere nine seconds behind. Jabe and Tommy, seeing the futility in rushing across the line for third place, sat back and sipped until the clock hit 5:10.
Jaber finishes up. Finally.
The Boot record is still held by the Follansbee/Davidson repeat team of 2010 (1:24), but with Will, the two-time Yard Race champion and record holder showing up in 2011 to take on the Boot for the first time since its addition to the schedule, the ink in the record books may be subject to change.
Jabe & Tom: 5:10 (1,8)
Rade & Charlie: 1:35 (2,10)
Ed & Ron: 1:26 (3,6)
It's easy to laugh after three liters of lager
After the Boot , naturally, are the two most precision-oriented events: Darts and Buck Hunter. Darts were fairly uneventful, with Ed and Ron showing their prowess at the more low-tech shooting event. With some outstanding pointing by Rade, we managed to go undefeated in Darts, besting the elder statesmen. Ed was not about to let his progeny surpass him on the cork, and the two of them claimed two points, ahead of Jabe and Tommy in the event.
The big man aims small
Ed lets Rade know a thing or two about a thing or two
Jabe & Tom: (1,9)
Rade & Charlie: (3,13)
Ed & Ron: (2,8)
Rade and I were surging as we entered perhaps my strongest event, while Ed and Ron were making a real push to make up for their slow start. Jabe and Tommy were not floundering, but had lost the sure-footing of their first three events. I had confidence in my partner and knew that we had a serious chance at putting the title out of reach before heading into the Photohunt. We went first to put the pressure on the competition. My goalie and I put up strong numbers. Jabe and Tommy went next, with Tommy edging out Rade by a few points and getting within spitting distance of my score, but our gold for the event seemed intact. Next up, Ed and Ron, despite their Libertarian citizenship, proved themselves somewhat of Luddites, failing to put up significant numbers with the orange gun.
Jabe & Tom: 3377 + 4233 = 7610 (2,11)
Rade & Charlie: 4428 + 4168 = 8596 (3,16)
Ed & Ron: 873 + 1947 = 2820 (1,9)
With the titled sewn up, we headed down the block for Photohunt. Again, the numbers were not close enough to be significant and the podium was set. There would be no need for a tie-break Beirut match.
Jabe and Tommy try to make up ground with Erotic Photohunt.
Jabe & Tom: 105,000 + 80,017 = 185,017 (3,14)
Rade & Charlie: 129,432 + 51, 867 = 187,299 (2,18)
Ed & Ron: 61,359 + 12,705 = 74,064 (1,10)
Rado and Tommy keep it collegial
As always, the BGO is the best day of the year, and the best part is always the year’s newcomers. Ed and Ron, fierce competitors, were disappointed by their final results but plan to return to the field of play in 2011. Congrats to all the slackletes. Finally, the podium:
Gold: Rade and Charlie
Silver: Jabe and Tommy
Bronze: Ed and Ron